Abba, "Daddy"

Right now I am up at 1am with my heart rate going 130bpm and I just can't sleep. Maybe because I get to go home to NC in the morning. Whatever the reason, I wanted to share a special moment I had with Caroline on the phone the other day.

As many of you know, Caroline is from Rwanda and Benjamin's sister. They are both survivors of the 1994 Rwanda Genocide. Anyway, we have been trying to get Caroline here to us for almost a year and a half. She suffered a horrible fate in June of 2006 that I could never begin to explain in a blog.

So I finally got word of how I could contact her personally by phone and check on her. We have been writing letters and missionaries have tried to make contact but communication has been very difficult. It was such a joy to hear her sweet voice on the other end of the line. I was so excited and had so much to say but controlled myself. The horrible event that took place last June has left physical, spiritual, and psychological scars. When I would speak with Ben, he said she had no joy in her life anymore. What a blessing it was to hear "joy" in her voice as we connected over a telephone wire!!

She asked how I was doing and all about San Diego. I told her we lived near the ocean and about how big and beautiful it is. She was so excited and told me she was taking tests to see how she would place in our system. She just started learning English a year ago but you would never know it. She spoke so clearly. She asked how Faith and Isaac were doing and to tell them how much she loved and missed them. Then the most incredible thing happened. Something we or Ben could have never imagined. She didn't ask how Jim was doing but instead she said, "How is Daddy?" You see this is quite a miracle from God because it was men who did such horrible things to her and we never knew if she would ever trust a man again. For her to call Jim "Daddy" made my heart leap and tears flowed. Nothing has been more difficult for Jim and me than to know how she is in so much pain and we just can't get to her and make it better. She is like our daughter and we love her so much.

For a brief moment, God let me feel what it must be like when we come to Him and say "Abba" Father, or "Daddy" for He is our Daddy who loves us so much. My prayer for Caroline is that she will allow herself to crawl upon her Heavenly Daddy's lap and let Him hold her, love her, and heal her wounds.